Love Notes From Adriane

This week, let’s dive into the topic of my grief. The onset of 2023 marked the realization that my maternal grandmother was rapidly declining, and our time together was limited. In March of 2023, the extended family celebrated her 85th birthday, but by July, she found herself in a nursing facility fighting with congestive heart failure and other health issues. Come the end of September, she transitioned to hospice care, taking her final breath on Friday, November 10th, 2023. The week leading up to her passing was a somber and unsettling experience, as we prepared for the inevitable.

Grateful that she was in her right mind until the end, my grandmother and I said we loved each other one last time Thursday, November 9th. However, the moment she departed, my world underwent a profound transformation. Losing my greatest supporter, the person who embraced me despite my flaws, left a void. In her eyes, I could do no wrong, and her pride in me was immeasurable.

Crafting a speech for her funeral proved to be an emotionally charged, out-of-body experience. Each memory invoked tears as I fought with the realization that there would be no more moments to create with her.

Post-funeral, the five-hour drive home was a silent journey marked by disbelief. Leaving her behind and acknowledging her absence, coupled with the realization that I could no longer call and hear her voice, left me in silent despair. Yet, amid the grief, a shift occurred within me during that drive. My family, always important, became my foremost priority. The awareness that they were all I had intensified the tears streaming down my face.

Though grief still at times overwhelms me, I’ve come to understand it. Grateful for the 35 years of life with my grandmother, I am now committed to maximizing my time with loved ones. My mindset has shifted towards a deep appreciation for family and friends, and I yearn to cherish and spend quality time with them.

To those navigating grief, present or future, my prayers extend to you. May God cradle you in His arms, providing comfort amidst the difficulty. Understand that grief, though challenging, is a gift, and my hope is that you embrace more moments with the ones you hold dear.

I love you granny! XOXO